I was looking up a citation for a commenter on this blog who wanted more information about one of my posts. While researching the question, I found another interesting study to post:
The greater power of bad events over good ones is found in everyday events, major life events (e.g., trauma), close relationship outcomes, social network patterns, interpersonal interactions, and learning processes.
Bad emotions, bad parents, and bad feedback have more impact than good ones, and bad information is processed more thoroughly than good. The self is more motivated to avoid bad self-definitions than to pursue good ones. Bad impressions and bad stereotypes are quicker to form and more resistant to disconfirmation than good ones. Various explanations such as diagnosticity and salience help explain some findings, but the greater power of bad events is still found when such variables are controlled. Hardly any exceptions (indicating greater power of good) can be found.
Taken together, these findings suggest that bad is stronger than good, as a general principle across a broad range of psychological phenomena. (PsycINFO Database Record c) 2009 APA, all rights reserved)
5 comments:
Doesn't Dr Spock say one insult to a child is worth a thousand compliments?
The last sentence is a total misunderstanding of the truth, "these findings suggest that bad is stronger than good, as a general principle across a broad range of psychological phenomena". It is true that we avoid the "bad experiences of life". But we do that to enjoy the good of life. So the good is what we seek, and we avoid the bad to do so. Good is infinitely more powerful than bad.
Thank you, Mike2 and Anonymous, for contributing to the blog. Very interesting comments.
I'm certainly not equipped to write an essay, nor is this the forum for an overlong boring opinion, but this does touch on somrthing I've observed.
When I was young I assumed everyone was brought up exactly like me---basically, fed, clothed, and allowed my own way (within reason.) I was never yelled at (well, at least not before my little sister was born and I tried to smother her---Mom did kind of lose it that day, and chased me with a fly-swatter, but I could run faster:):) We didn't have lots of money, but we weren't POOR either, and never was I denied anything I needed or really begged for. And certainly I was never without the basic benefits of civilization---piano lessons, art classes, Brownie Scouts, Sunday School just often enough to count as religious education, but Mom never made me go more than once a month or so. Fine with me. If there's one thing I look backwards to with thankfulness, it's that my childhood didn't screw me up irreparably! No scars, and as we've seen on this site, scars can be deep indeed.
BUT---how right to observe that the "bad" can mark more indelibly than the "good." I certainly did not lack for petting, praise, adulation, and compliments when I was a spoiled little girl---aunts, uncles, cousins, etc., were always telling me how cute and smart and gifted and generally gosh-darn-adorable I was, and I certainly believed them!:):) But do you know what I remember best? An overheard conversation between my mother and her sister-in-law, in which Mom said:
"Our daughters couldn't be more different! Mine looks sweet but has a temper like the Devil, and yours looks mischievous but is the sweetest little thing!"
I was appalled! Me, a "devil?" My cousin, "sweetest little thing?"
But maybe that was right after I'd tried unsuccessfully to smother Lyn. Mom and I get along okay now. But I definitely remember being called a Devil!
A spanking here or there, a yelling or two, an isolated unfortunate incident between parent and child is probably not going to do too much damage. I assume you're speaking of the ongoing, chronic abuse, and you are probably right that this will be ingrained in the psyche more deeply than a million ice-cream-cones after school.
What an amazing story, BWJ. To think you remember that so vividly! Thanks for telling us.
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